Yesterday

"Kuy, gising na."

Dad woke me up. It was 8 in the morning. It was unusual of having a gray hue on my room instead of a bright orange-yellow. It took me ten minutes to stretch, yawn and stare at the ceiling.

It was raining.

It was one of the perfect mornings that I've ever had. I prefer having a cold and rainy morning instead of a bright and warm one. I love when the sky's gray. I love how the cold blankets my body while drinking mom's hot chocolate.

It was still raining when I arrived at the office at around 9:30. I was supposed to pass the requirements of my scholarship but the office was closed. I waited for a few minutes. It didn't open. The place was desserted.

I was alone. I was stupid.

So, I went to the mall to chill. Alone. I first went to National Bookstore. I went to the magazine stand and read the latest issue of National Geographic. I managed to finish reading it after 20 minutes. It cost 399 pesos but I didn't spend even a single penny. By 11:30, I got hungry ergo ate heavy lunch. Alone.

While walking alone in the mall, I saw my high school crush. She was still beautiful. Her chinky eyes. Her sweet smile. Her fair complexion. I thought she didn't recognize me. I haven't shaved for three days. I was wrong. She even smiled at me and said, "Hi kuya!".

Right. Kuya. Big brother. She still considers me as her big brother. She wished of having one, like what she told me a few years back. I wanted to be more than her kuya back then. Foolish thought.

Time flies so fast.

I went back to National Bookstore. I saw some books. I have this urge to buy these three books. I imagined having a thousand peso bill in my wallet. I held the books for a minute or two.

It was painful. Window shopping isn't really my thing.

With limited money, I decided to go home - an hour journey.

While walking at the sidewalk, I saw her. Again.

"Ikaw nanaman?"

"Yes, ako nanaman. (smiles)"

"Sige kuya, bye!"

Yesterday was an odd day.

Time to move on.

Future Tense

While some of my batch mates (mostly from the Social Science and Humanities Department) are somewhat eager to land a decent job after graduation. I on the other hand will still study for another 5 years (specialization not included). Today. I feel like I'm taking a college entrance exam, again - filling up some forms, pasting some 2x2 ID pictures on it, photocopying some important documents and the list goes on and on.

I overheard them saying, "I wanna be rich" or "I hope I'll have an extraordinary career growth" or "I hope I work in a stable company".

And when they asked me for my future plans, I just told them, in a straightforward manner, like a bullet darting its way to the victim, "I'm going to study medicine. Still a student for the next 5 years". They were a bit surprised.

"Aren't you tired of being a student? I mean, another four years of studying? Why don't you just work instead and build your career in the field of research?", they asked.

"You know what, my mind tells me that I can still endure such stressful activities. Stress is actually everywhere! Do you think working for your monthly earnings is not stressful? I guess not. I know my capabilities. I know the limitations of my body. I know it's hard but I believe it is my duty to serve our country once I'm through with med school. And with that, I know that through my diligence and hardwork, I can help those people who are in need. I believe it is my destiny to become a doctor. We might not know, in the near future, I'm going to prescribe you some medicines that would actually save your life."

"Each and everyone of us has its own decisions. We are smart enough to determine our capacity, be mental, emotional or physical. I love what I'm doing right now and I'll do whatever it takes to reach my goals in life."

They were stunned. So am I.

We remember 9/11

September 11, 2001.

9:00 pm, Philippine Time.

I was only 11 at that time. I was about to go to sleep when a disturbing looped video of a burning skyscraper caught my attention. I was really curious and decided to watch CNN instead. My parents were watching it too, so I asked, "Pa, ano yan? Trailer ng action movie? (Pa, what is that? Is that a trailer of an upcoming action movie?)"

"No, hindi yan trailer (No, it's not a trailer). It's really happening".

As of that moment, the 20 floors (85th to 110th floor) of the North Tower was a burning inferno. It was inaccessible. I could still remember people waving their clothes from the windows of their offices as black smoke continued to rise from the building. A gaping hole brought about by an impact of American Airlines Flight 11 made the news media across the globe to speculate that it was an accident. New York had already experienced this kind of accident back in 1945 when a B-25 Mitchell bomber plane crashed between the 79th and 80th floor of the Empire State Building. Then the speculation abruptly changed to an act of terrorism when at exactly 9:03 AM, a Boeing 767 United Airlines Flight 175 crashed at the South Tower.

Photographers also have grotesque images of people jumping off from the burning inferno of World Trade Center. Some claimed that they're cowards. Others label them as the unsung heroes of 9/11. For me, they were left with desperate choices. They chose to jump than to suffocate from the building's thick black smoke or be roasted by a 2,300 degree Fahrenheit fire. The news continued as Pentagon was hit by a Boeing 757 at 9:05 AM in Washington and a plane crashed somewhere in Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

Everyone panicked.

People from different countries have witnessed such event.

And thus, we remember the people who suffered the ordeal.

We remember the jumpers. Ordinary people will grumble how hard life is despite having all the needs and wants in their lives. Jumpers have to deal with such difficult decisions of whether to fight the fire or just to escape this nightmare.

We remember the firefighters who have bravely saved people from the burning towers and died.

We remember the people who died inside their respective offices in the World Trade Center and Pentagon. They weren't prepared. Some died instantly at their desks. Others had to suffer so much pain before the building collapsed.

We remember the passengers and crew of United Airlines Flight 175, American Airlines Flight 11 and American Airlines Flight 77. Even if they didn't arrive at their destination, they were at least prepared and aware of what was happening on their flight minutes before the crash.

We remember the passengers and crew of United Airlines Flight 93 who bravely fought their hijackers and instead of heading to the US Capitol, they crashed on a rural field somewhere in Shanksville, Pennsylvania.

We remember the victims' family members. They will never forget the day when they had their last phone calls with their loved ones.

We remember the terrorists. They also have their own share of story; the reason why they did this inhumane act.

Lastly, we remember 9/11. It was a wake up call to all us. It made us realized that anything can happen in the world. Live life to the fullest. Cherish every moment of our life.

We will never forget 9/11.

Ever.

Sentimental Piece

Being a Biology student isn't really that easy. You are required to understand, analyze and memorize wholeheartedly the biochemical processes of life such as Glycolysis, Krebs Cycle and the Electron Transport Chain. You are also required to pass laboratory reports on time (usually everyday). You can't really use your imagination once you deal with the technicalities. There's always a right and wrong answers. If you don't have references, you'll have a grade of zero plus you're going to be accused of plagiarism.

It is REALLY stressful, I tell you.

The good thing is, I am currently enrolled in a Literature class that enhances students' capabilities in terms of writing by expressing their own opinions and perspectives. Each one of us has the chance to write what we feel after reading certain selections and watching foreign movies about memories, friendship, war, beliefs and love.

Surprisingly, our professor was also a BS Biology graduate of UP Diliman (cum laude) but took another degree at Siliman University (BA English major in Creative Writing) after graduation.

I just realized that it is very hard to write a movie review/critique if you base from the technicalities of the movie. You have to be keen in observing and evaluating the actor's delivery of their skills. Also, you have to analyze the plot of the movie, whether if it's coherent with the theme or not. It's really hard, given the fact that I do not have any background in film studies. But when you make a personal reflection about a certain movie, ideas start to flow continuously until you create such magnificent piece.

Anyway, I got really surprised when I saw my reaction papers. I usually get a grade of 1.00. Moreover, our professor is fond of putting some 'love letters' on a vacant side of the paper. The latest was this:

"You are consistent with your works, keep it up! You have a big potential of being good writer."

This made my day, at least. It really compensated from yesterday's depressing event. I have never thought being a good writer. I sometimes commit grammatical errors. When constructing a piece, I tend to be incoherent. Sometimes, my thoughts are entropic; messy.

But then again, there's always a room for improvement.

The point of this post is, I miss writing.

Optimism Prime

I personally do not like when I'm doing the same thing over and over again. This is primarily the reason why I don't want a job that requires you to sit in front of the computer, doing the same thing over and over again. I'd rather quit the job than to suffer the psychological ordeal.

Now this lead to answer the question as to why I prefer doing a LOT of things than focusing on just one work (given that those things that I really do are my interests).

People around me might notice that I play several important roles in every organizations I joined. First, there's the council, then my second family, BioS (Biological Society) and then, Himati. They think that I'm suffering from their specific demands. They think that I can't handle the three organizations simultaneously. They do not believe that I have this potential to straighten things up. You know guys, I still sleep, at least 6 hrs a day. My academic standing isn't compromised as of this moment. Sometimes I'm pressured to do all those things.

But do you want to know my secret?

Time Management.

It's not really a secret or talent. It takes time to learn this old magic trick. You see, three years studying in UP (or any institutions you're currently enrolled in) is already enough to muster self-discipline and time management. Frankly I have a hard time to manage all those stress when I was still a freshman. Little by little, I learned how to balance academics and extra-curricular activities.

It's just a matter of dealing such things that are important to you.

Know your priorities.

Set you goals.

Accept defeat.

Make your winning moments as one of your inspirations.

Let us temporarily forget those leisure activities such as watching movies at the cinema, shopping and et cetera. We can still visit them if time permits. The world won't end soon. Don't worry.

And always remember that a smile on your face, despite the stress will make your day complete. I guarantee that you will have a happy disposition in life.

Lastly, one should exude optimism to attain success.

Evolutionary speaking,

You know class, ideally it doesn’t really matter if you have a car or other luxuries in life. Do you think a man will look better if he owns a brand new car? It doesn’t make any sense! Your physical attributes (personality included, for a good reason) are one of your best assets in which you can ever present to the multitude. Earth has already been here in our solar system for at least 4.6 billion years. The first microorganisms appeared 2 billion years later, and then the complex evolutionary process occurred gradually until such time that it molded several genera and families base on the capability of the organisms to adapt on certain climatic conditions.

Nature will naturally select those who have the greatest number of advantageous traits. Those who do not have advantageous traits will soon disappear since traits will not be passed on to the next generation. Moreover, it will create a stable gene pool given at the right environmental condition.

But then again, we humans are so intelligent that we actually seek for practicality. We do not think of the possible detrimental effects to the future generations base on the way we choose our own lifetime partners. It may sound superficial to you, but think of it this way: If we continue to choose luxuries of life over the person per se, time will come that the next generation will have less advantageous traits and might lead to an event that we do not wish to happen.

—-

These are some of the things that I wish to discuss if ever I teach Evolutionary Biology in the near future.

It's great to be a kid again.

We decided to watch Toy Story 3 in 3D. I was really excited because it was my first time to experience 3D cinema. Even if it's a bit expensive (Php 250, with free large popcorn or hotdog), it was still worth it. No, don't get me wrong, I won't spoil you about what really happened between Andy and his toys. I will just tell you something about what I felt after watching the third installment of Pixar's most successful animated movie.

The story was again simple, like the previous installments. Despite its simplicity, the movie never fails to convey its message to the audience. The three Toy Story films may share some similar plot lines in having the constant fear of being discarded and unwanted when one turns old, or to obsess with the thought of being forgotten and unappreciated, and almost always comes with a distance to conquer.

The movie involves several themes such as facing consequences of inevitable hopelessness, which will affect most of the audience since they already know how much they care for the characters, friendship and courage. It tackles certain things on how someone turned into a bitter soul due to rejection, tremendous loss and abandonment. Although the light hearted moments balance all of these dark elements in the movie.

While waiting in the line, I heard a lot of kids saying that it was the best movie ever. I was really touched. I was only five years old when the first installment came out. I remembered that I used to say that same statement. It made me feel young again.

Moving on is really hard, but we have to accept that not all things are permanent.

Intimidating

There is a thick barrier between the upperclassmen and the freshmen. As you might have noticed, freshies are like flocks of birds. They work as a group, they walk as a group, they eat as a group and they study as a group. Now, let’s take a closer look between these two groups.

On the younger side, freshies tend to ignore their own upperclassmen. One reason is that, the upperclassmen are intimidating. Another thing is, they have this superiority complex. On the older side, upperclassmen tend to ignore the freshies because they are too sosyal for their taste or too maarte.

Mutualism at its best, not.

Three years ago, when I was still a freshie, I would always smile to some upperclassmen or say “Hi Ate/Kuya” shyly. It’s a bit rewarding if they smile back to you. Now that I’m already a senior, I can really tell that the feeling is very rewarding when some freshies (especially in your own course) smile and/or greet you, say along the pathway or in the corridor. You can easily tell whether a freshie is polite of pa-FC (feeling close).

I was really disappointed when I called some of the Bio freshies and they ignored me.

Oh well, I guess they are all different compared to the lower batches I’ve met for the past two years.