The Desperate Cerelac Story

OMG.




I can’t believe this. I really can’t believe this whole thing!


A while ago while finalizing the wedding invitation of Dhianne, my client, my stomach suddenly talked. He just kept on muttering these words over and over again:

FEED ME! FEED ME! FEED ME!

Food wasn’t an issue to our house until I realized that mom hadn’t gone shopping for our food in the grocery for almost a week already. Dang, the last two eggs were gone since I already ate those two days ago. I tried to make two hard boiled eggs, but it turned out that my estimates weren’t that precise and accurate. Sheesh. So I ended up with a hard egg white with a gooey orange-to-yellow-hue of the yolk. Uggh. I remembered drinking the yolk part. Pancit Cantons were out-of-stock too. Those were my fave dishes whenever I get hungry during the wee hours of the morning.

Thanks to my ingenuity I came up with a bright idea, so bright that I ended up puking the crap out of my mouth, well almost. My aunt’s husband gave us lots of sachets of Cerelac (wheat and milk flavor). It was intended for our 5-month old Belgian Malinois puppy, Fita. But then again, I was curious with its taste, texture and all tangible properties that exist on this baby food.



So I gave a shot with this food, with a twist.

I remembered last night when the Korean San Chai told the Korean Wo Tzue Lei that one can make pancakes out of flour, eggs and sugar. All you have to do was to mix all of the ingredients. In my case I only had the powder form of Cerelac. THE HELL I CARE. So I just mixed warm water, and Cerelac in the bowl. It was quite sticky, but sweet. But that’s not all! I made it extra special by filling the pan with enough cooking oil and heat it. I felt that I was a contestant of Hell’s Kitchen! When I felt that the stove generated enough heat on the frying pan, I placed the sticky concoction to it and poof, there was magic.



And then after ten minutes, it was still sticky despite having the brown coloration of the deep fried Cerelac. For my first ten bites I ate my wonderful invention sumptuously. After the eleventh bite I just realized that I was eating CRAP all along. It was so sweet that I started to feel sick. I think the remaining crap was good for only two scoops when I decided to dispose it. Don’t be mad at me for throwing food because even the hungriest child in Africa won’t dare eating my concoction because aside from its crappy look, it tasted like hell-what-kind-of-crap-is-this.



Sheesh. My stomach became disappointed. Suddenly, I was craving for something that is salty. So I ended up munching the Lumpia Shanghais. At least it wasn’t that ultra sweet.


Lesson learned: Cerelac is not edible when deep fried.



Period.